|| justjosh ||
| |||_archive_||| |
|---|
| || complete [/] |
| || shhhh - 2005-03-09 Opportunity is clear - 2005-03-05 about to..soon - 2005-02-28 Same Old Story - 2005-02-24 molly - 2004-04-04 |
| |||_recommended_||| |
| || neuroism.net [/] |
| || kelly [/] |
| || billy [/] |
|| 2002-03-15 ||
I've come to the realization, that i'm never going home ever again. I say again, because i always ponder this thought.. its so hard to explain. Every since December of 2000 i have been "on the run."It's so sad because i left to find out what i wanted to do with my life, how i wanted to live, who i wanted to be friends with and all the other things that go along with changing your enviornment.
I've left all those people behind. All of them. They are there, and i am here. It is so ironic. I always used to say that one day i was going to leave them all behind and move far far away. And i did. And it is scary, because i actually did something with my life. Now i'm not sure if i regret it, or if i made the right decision. I mean, some people, some things, you can't replace. I miss my friends. As fucked up as they were, i miss them.
I think i'm in shock. One day i'm living at home staying out all weekend long getting drunk and hating all the people around me... the next i'm living on a fucking island. No happiness. The only thing that has changed is my enviornment. Yet i feel like a totally different person. So many things are contradicting.
When is the room going to start spinning for me?
